If I could go back and have a conversation with my 30-year-old self, I would probably start by giving her a hug.
Then I'd hand her a cup of coffee.
And then I'd tell her to sit down because we're going to talk.
At 30, I thought everybody else had life figured out.
I thought there was some secret club where people knew exactly what they were doing, and somehow I missed the invitation.
What I've discovered over the years is that most of us are just doing the best we can with the information we have at the time.
So, if I could go back, here are a few things I wish someone had told me.
Nobody Knows What They're Doing
Seriously.
Some people are just more confident while they're figuring it out.
I spent years thinking everyone else had some magical roadmap.
Turns out most people are making educated guesses and hoping for the best.
Your Mistakes Won't Kill You
Now, some mistakes come with consequences.
I'm not saying go out and make terrible decisions just because Tamara said you'll be fine.
What I am saying is that every mistake doesn't have to become a life sentence.
Some of my biggest lessons came disguised as bad decisions.
God has a way of redeeming things we thought ruined us.
Stop Worrying About What Everybody Thinks
This one would have saved me years.
The truth is, most people are too busy worrying about what everyone thinks about them to spend much time thinking about you.
Read that again.
Freedom starts when you stop living for other people's approval.
Confidence Doesn't Come First
I used to think confident people took action because they were confident.
Now I know they became confident because they took action.
Confidence is built one brave step at a time.
Not one perfect step.
One brave step.
Your Timeline Is Not Broken
At 30, I never imagined I'd join the Army.
I certainly didn't imagine I'd serve 17 years, deploy three times, become a coach, write books, and eventually become a speaker.
If someone had shown me my future, I probably would have laughed.
Sometimes the things that make the least sense in the moment become the very things that prepare you for your purpose.
Buy the Good Shoes
Listen.
Life is hard enough without uncomfortable shoes.
That's all I'm saying.
God Is Not Finished With You
This may be the biggest one of all.
At 30, I thought I was running out of time.
At 40, I thought I should be further along.
At 50, I finally started stepping fully into my purpose.
Imagine if I had quit because I thought I was behind.
Some of the most beautiful chapters of your life may still be unwritten.
Don't let your age convince you that your story is over.
It isn't.
In fact, your next chapter might be your best one yet.
What advice would you give your younger self if you had five minutes and a cup of coffee together?
Instead of wishing you could go back and do things differently, take the wisdom you've gained and use it to move forward.
You can't change yesterday.
But you can absolutely change what happens next.
And trust me, the future version of you is counting on it.
❤️
Tamara Lea Patrick
Pivot Life Coaching 4 Restarting You